If You Take Care of Your Pooper, It Will Take Care of You..

Never, ever underestimate the importance of your pooper.

AKA, your digestive system.

Have you ever gone for more than two days without pinching off a loaf? Serious misery. In fact, I know of a relative of mine who had to resort to a TURKEY BASTER to relieve their misery after an extended period of non-dumpage. (Long story, and because I like this person, I think I'll keep that one to myself.)

Your backside's best friend is fibre. There are two kinds of fibre that you simply MUST have regularly in order for everything to flow smoothly- soluble (like the fibre found in fruit) and insoluble (that which is found in twigs and bark. Oh, and whole grains, too.) You need both to function smoothly.

I like to work fibre into all kinds of sneaky places. Over the last three years, we in the Williams family have reached a place in our dining lives where we eat almost nothing made of white flour. (White Flour=Death. I mean, have you ever squeezed in your hand a slice of Bens Holsum? Turns to glue in your hand, and I bet what happens in the depths of your bowels isn't much different.)

No white bread, no white pasta. OK, I use some white flour in my baking, but I'm working on it...don't hassle me, man.

In an attempt to make something both fibrous and palatable to two fussy veg*n kids at lunchtime (that was also not a nutritional disaster) I came up with these. My boy actually took one for lunch today and commented at supper how yummy they were. That means something coming from him, trust me. Give them a try and see what you think.

Bran and Oatmeal Snack Bars

Preheat Oven to 425 degrees. These are best cooked on a baking stone, BTW.

Mix in a large bowl:

3/4 cup dry bran (not bran cereal)

1/4 cup rolled oats

2 Tbsp toasted wheat germ

1/4 cup brown sugar

3/4 cup WW flour

1/2 cup white flour

1/2 tsp salt

Mix in:

1/4 cup silken tofu

1/2 cup vegan margarine

(Use your hands to work this in.)

Then add the following ingredients, already mixed together:

1/4 c maple syrup or agave nectar

1/4 cup hot water

1 tsp vanilla

Add a bit more flour if necessary to make a smooth ball, only slightly sticky. Roll out onto baking stone. Use a pizza cutter to cut into bars of the desired size. Prick with a fork. bake about 10 minutes at 375. Cool on stone about three minutes before transferring to a wire rack.

Eat, Poop, and Enjoy!

PS: I'm taking an informal poll. I want to know, do you read on the toilet? And if so, what do you read? Drop me a line and let me know.